Impossible and Improbable



‘Off With Her Head’ shouted the Queen of Hearts from ‘Alice in Wonderland’ 

I had accidently wondered into the mirror with Alice, when we came upon the Queen of Hearts. The Queen wanted to play bridge with me. I told her I hated the game, plus it was very boring. 

‘Off With Her Head’, the Queen yelled. 

I was suddenly surrounded with soldiers and marched off for execution. 

The Joker ran quickly for the King of Hearts. 

The executioner raised his axe. ‘Swish!’ Down it came! 

The King reached us and yelled ‘Stop! ‘ 

The executioner didn’t have Tiger Wood’s excellent reflex action. Up came the axe but he had touched my neck. The reflex action was one second too slow. The sharp axe left a 
6 cm by 1 mm cut on my neck (Tiger Woods would have done better). 


My office is in Geylang Road. The Red Light district, so I am told, is just 50 meters ahead. There is a condo at the back of my office block that has lots of foreigners. 

One early morning, as usual, I took the short cut through the back. When suddenly a foreign man rushed out of the gate with the police in hot pursuit. 

He saw me. Caught hold of me. Put his sharp knife on my neck and told the police to back off or he will slice my throat from ear to ear. 

All stopped and slowly backed-off. Unknown to the foreigner, there was a police sniper behind us. The rifle rose. The sniper took aim. ‘Kapow!’ The bullet went straight into the man’s head. 

It was a reaction but his hand moved. The knife sliced the side of my neck. The medic rushed to stop me bleeding like a sliced plucked chicken. I was sent to the hospital to be stitched up. 

Beware! The Storyteller!

Note: The impossible and improbable stories for the scar on June’s neck. Ouch!!

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